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  • Alexandra Hillenbrand

Me, me, me!

If you're here, then I figure you're obsessed with me, in love with me, or maybe just wanna figure out what I'm doing with my life. Even if it's just the slightest pique of curiosity in your mind going, "I wonder if I can spot a typo in her writing". Guess what, there's a grand chance that will happen at some point, if it hasn't already.

Also, my name is Alex. I hope you already knew that or this is going to be incredibly awkward. I'm in my post-grad era towards self-care, mindfulness, and personal growth which is just a really unnecessary way of articulating that I'm unemployed, have no money, and a very uncertain life direction. But hey! I'm super fun to hang out with, at least thats what my therapist says.

Speaking of therapists, I'm a bit mentally unstable, but also not really, because it's all in good fun. I once had a friend tell me "You're crazy but normal and that's why I like you," and I don't really think there's a better way to sum up what knowing me is like. I could spend the first half of my day stalking the guy that looked at me that one time when I accidentally cut him in line on wing Friday, the next pacing around my room with enough energy to pick up the submarine from the bottom of the Atlantic. At the end of the day it's really not that serious, even though most of the time I convince myself that it is, and also that there is a serial killer in my room (intrusive thought).

I'm an insanely insane people pleaser in that it's not intentional, but actually an undiagnosed mental condition. Did I just say I wasn't mentally unstable? It was a fabrication of my reality. Like, I really can't say no to people or disappoint them or hurt them in any way or else I lie awake with an eye twitch for several business days. It's like I was given the Obedience curse from Ella Enchanted, except the only people it doesn't work for are my parents, my sisters, and any authority figure (sorry to the Pope!). I'm sure we could unpack that later! I went to an all-girls Catholic school.

My hobbies include Hot Girl Walking (I really can't call it anything other than this I apologize), reading, watching TV (is that a hobby?), listening to enough Taylor Swift that I've been in the top 0.1% of her listeners for the past 3 years, and making lists to plan out my perfect life. So far on that list is a beach house with my sisters and our dogs. Really, I'm a spinster in the making, just waiting to come out.

I love love though. I will read any book, watch any movie, or Tik Tok that has a sweet and endearing couple. I can't help it, I'm a hopeless romantic who hates the idea of giving up her independence, gets super easily overwhelmed, lives with her parents, and can't stomach the idea of trusting a man. Still, love is my favorite topic in songs and pop culture. I just think it's so special. Why can't it happen to me? And while I know that undermines what I just stated, a girl can't be perfect. You should know that at this point in our relationship.

In my post-grad era Alex 2.0 is coming right at ya. Maybe she's new and improved, maybe she's actually much, much, MUCH worse. Guess you'll have to stick around!

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